Fritinancy

Be Plus

Back in December 2012 I wrote about Be. wines, a Beringer brand targeted at young women. “Be.” is a cute ’n’ sassy truncation of “Beringer,” and each varietal is tagged with an imperative: Be.Bright (Pinot Grigio), Be.Radiant (Riesling), Be.Flirty (Moscato), and so on.

 

So much cleverness obviously begged to be imitated. And so behold (or Be.hold) Be toothpaste from Crest, which I spotted at Walgreen’s earlier this week.

 

Crest launched the “innovative new line” back in January. According to a press release from Procter & Gamble, Crest’s parent company:

“Crest is always looking at trends to develop products that give consumers a unique yet effective experience,” said Rishi Dhingra, Marketing Director, Procter & Gamble. “Crest Be® was developed out of the research and insights that consumers are looking for experiential purchases. The new toothpastes not only provide the foundational benefits needed for oral health but allow for an unexpected experience through flavors that offer personal expression.”

As you can see, not only does Be toothpaste share a name (albeit an unpunctuated one) with Be. wine, it also duplicates the commanding tone. “Be Dynamic” is the brand’s “lime spearmint zest™” flavor; “Be Inspired” is “vanilla mint spark™”; and “Be Adventurous” is “mint chocolate trek™.” Yes, the TMs are [sic].

Chocolate-flavored toothpaste is weird enough; I’m not convinced I want to invite a trek into in my mouth. (All those muddy boots…) Some unexpected experiences are best left unexperienced. 

Ever Lovin'

Names that incorporate “ever” are more popular than, well, ever. But the concept has been around for more than a century. Here are three old-school “ever” brands and eight that have appeared since 2005.

 

The originals

Eveready.

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Eveready batteries, circa 1920s. Via Eveready.com.

Founded in St. Louis in 1896 as American Electrical Novelty & Manufacturing Company). The company changed its name in 1905 to the American Ever Ready Company, which was shortened to Eveready in 1917. Since 1980, the Eveready Battery Company has sold both Energizer and Eveready batteries.

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Everlast.

Now associated with boxing, Everlast was founded in the Bronx in 1910 as a swimwear manufacturer:

Seventeen year-old Jacob Golomb, the son of a tailor and an avid swimmer, was dissatisfied with swimsuits of the time that barely lasted a season, and began making suits that he guaranteed would last for a full year.

In 1917, a young boxer named Jack Dempsey asked Golomb to make protective headgear that would last more than 15 rounds; two years later, Dempsey won the world heavyweight championship wearing Everlast gloves.

In 2002 Everlast extended its sporting-goods brand into men’s grooming products with the “Everlast Original 1910” label. (The cologne has base notes of patchouli, leather, tonka bean, and musk.)

Everlast is also the stage name of the American rapper, singer, and songwriter Erik Francis Schrody.

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Everclear.

Old Everclear logo.

Current Everclear branding.

 

Everclear is a brand of pure grain alcohol whose original formula (190 proof, or 95 percent alcohol) is illegal in 14 states. (California and some other states sell a 151 proof version.) The brand name was first used in commerce in 1917 by the American Distilling Co.; the brand is now manufactured and sold by Luxco of St. Louis.

The rock band Everclear, formed in Portland, Oregon, in 1991, takes its name from the alcohol brand.

The ’Tis Season

The lights, the carols, the shopping-mall Santas: verily, ’tis ’Tis the Season season once again. The ’tis-ing started early this year (mid-October!) and shows no sign of abating. In fact, this year I discovered a Tis the Season store—correction, “Christmas Shoppe”—in Millersburg, Ohio. (The apostrophe on that Tis is mysteriously missing.) And if the website design is any indication, this is a place to shoppe till you droppe in a queasy stupor.

 

Cliché: check. White-outlined letters: check. Olde Englishe spelling: check. Busy background photo: check. Squiggly clip art: check.

Misspelled “its”: check.

So that’s where the apostrophe went!

Lulu-palooza

Lulu self-publishing service. Launched in 2002; based in Raleigh, North Carolina.

 

“About our name: The dictionary defines a lulu as a remarkable person, object or idea. Here at Lulu, we are passionate about creating a remarkable experience for people to tell their stories and celebrate their experiences – simply – through words and pictures.”

More on “the dictionary defines” here and here.

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Lulu dating service, a division of Date.com. History and physical location uncertain.

 

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Lulu’s Love Shack, a dating service. Google says it’s based in South Africa, but it appears to operate in the U.S.

 

 

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Lulu, “the girls-only app for dating intelligence.” Originally called Luluvise. Launched in February 2013; based in New York City. Not related to the Lulu or Lulu’s Love Shack dating services.

 

Co-founder Alexandra Chong told the New York Times she got the idea for Lulu “during a boozy brunch with female friends the day after an awkward Valentine’s Day setup.” Chong concluded “that women needed a focused search engine for dating — a ‘Guygle’.”

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Lululemon yoga and workout wear for women and men. Founded in 1998; based in Vancouver, British Columbia.

From the website:

The lululemon name was chosen in a survey of 100 people from a list of 20 brand names and 20 logos. The logo is actually a stylized “A” that was made for the first letter in the name “athletically hip”, a name which failed to make the grade.

Lululemon founder and chairman Chip Wilson (often referred to in the press as “billionaire chairman Chip Wilson”) has acquired a reputation for outspokenness. Among his more notorious remarks:

- “Frankly, some women's bodies just don't actually work [for the yoga pants].” –responding to complaints that the company’s $92 yoga pants are too sheer. He later apologized. (The company’s clothing is made in sizes 2 to 12. Most American women wear a 12 or larger.)

- “Breast cancer came into prominence in the 1990’s. I suggest this was due to the number of cigarette-smoking Power Women who were on the pill…” – blog post, March 30, 2009

- Child labor “is the single easiest way to spread wealth around the world.” – 2005 interview with The Tyee (British Columbia).

- “The name ‘lululemon’ has no roots and means nothing other than it has 3 ‘L’s’ in it.” – 2009 blog post that has been removed from the Lululemon website. In December 2004, Canada’s National Post Business Magazine quoted Wilson as saying he chose the name because “L” is hard for native speakers of Japanese to pronounce. “It’s funny to watch them say it,” he said.

In 2011, Lululemon shopping bags were emblazoned with “Who is John Galt?”, a reference to Atlas Shrugged, the 1959 novel by Ayn Rand. “Who is John Galt?” is a popular slogan with libertarians and extreme conservatives and shorthand for “self-interest is my only interest.”

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More on the productive -palooza suffix.

"X Just Got Y"

A familiar trope (or snowclone) in new manifestations.

 

“Disneyland Just got Merrier.” (Billboard in Oakland, California.)

 

 

“Comfort Just Got Sleek.” Jockey print ad featuring stylist Rachel Zoe (the blonde woman). Other slogans in the campaign: “Comfort Just Got Flirty,” “Comfort Just Got Glam.”

 

“Winning Just Got Closer.” One of the teaser slogans for the new Graton Resort & Casino, which opened in Rohnert Park (Sonoma County, California) November 5. Never underestimate the public’s willingness to overestimate the odds: Opening-day traffic created gridlock on US 101, and “once on city streets, many motorists ditched their cars at hotels and business parks to make their way on foot, plodding across a large field toward the hulking casino like ‘zombies’,” according to a California Highway Patrol officer quoted in a Los Angeles Times report. The doors were so mobbed that the casino opened an hour ahead of schedule. The 340,000-square-foot resort is owned by the Federated Indians of Graton Rancheria and is open 24/7.

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More “X Just Got Y” posts: Insomnia Just Got Better, Junk Food Just Got Nervous, Tough Just Got Better.

Bad Movie Day

Speaking of badness:

Johnny Knoxville in Bad Grandpa. In theaters now.

 

Cameron Diaz in Bad Teacher (2011). “She doesn’t give an ‘F’.”

Billy Bob Thornton in Bad Santa (2003). “He doesn’t care if you’re naughty or nice.”

 

Harvey Keitel in Bad Lieutenant (1992). “Gambler. Thief. Killer. Cop.”

And in live theater, Bad Jews is playing Off Broadway through December 15.

Of the four movies, I’ve seen only Bad Teacher, which was sour and unpleasant and, well, bad, despite the charms of Cameron Diaz and costar Jason Segel. Now the movie’s being adapted for a CBS TV series; Diaz is a producer, and Ari Graynor (terrific as Eva Destruction in the very enjoyable Whip It) will take the title role.

What Does “Urban” Mean in Brand Names?

Back in March 2009 I wrote about the shifting meaning of “urban,” from the standard dictionary definition (“of the city”) to something tinged with politics and sociology. The emerging meaning of “urban,” I wrote, often translates to “dominated by a racial minority.” (@UrbanEnglish, for example, is the Twitter handle for something that calls itself Ghetto Translations™.) Although I mentioned a few brands with “urban” in their names—Urban Dictionary, Urban Outfitters, National Urban League—I focused on lower-case “urban,” puzzling over phrases such as “Oakland, like most urban cities…”

Since then I’ve continued to track the spread of “urban.” I’m still seeing redundant-seeming usages like this one, from Maggie Koerth-Baker’s 2012 book Before the Lights Go Out: Conquering the Energy Crisis Before It Conquers Us: “Merriam isn’t a small town. … Yet Merriam isn't a suburb, either—or an urban city.” (Emphasis added.) But what’s really gotten my attention is an explosion of upper-case “urban” in brand names.

Granted, all of these brands originated in cities and cater to city dwellers. But that alone doesn’t explain the popularity of “urban” in their names. Rather, I suspect it’s a meme—a viral phenomenon. “Urban” here is shorthand for “cool” and “savvy”; with few exceptions, there are no racial overtones.

I should know better by now, but I’m always surprised when I see so many copycat names, especially in a concentrated geographical area. It’s as though each of these business owners felt compelled to tap out the same code, fearful that even a slight deviation (“urbane,” say, or just “urb”) would break the spell.

Here’s a far-from-complete rundown of the urban names I’ve noticed.

 

This Is the End

Spotted yesterday in the New Nonfiction section of Oakland’s Rockridge Branch library:

 

The End of Worry, The End of Big, The End of Money, The End of Men.

 

In 2008, when I originally wrote about book-title formulas, I counted 43 “The End of X” titles on Amazon. When I repeated the exercise this week, I stopped counting at 50 “The End of X” titles in the business section alone—10 of them published in 2013. I also saw at least 20 “The End of X” titles in American History (my favorite: The End of Jewish Radar) and 15 in Self-Help.

With the release of James K. Galbraith’s The End of Normal next year, we’ll have a titleclone twofer: “The End of X” and “Normal.” I can imagine Amazon recommending to buyers of Galbraith’s book that they also spring for The End of Normal: A Wife’s Anguish, a Widow’s Comeback, by Stephanie Madoff Mack (yes, those Madoffs).

The Modifiables

Need a title for a movie/TV series/play/book? You can’t go wrong with The + [Adjective] + s.

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“The Awesomes,” a new animated series from Seth Myers and Mike Shoemaker, premieres on Hulu August 1.

Tagline: “Superhero…ish.” For more on -ish as suffix and as word, see Separated by a Common Language and Urban Dictionary.

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“The Capables,” a new play about a reality-TV show, is Off-Broadway through August 3.

 

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The Interestings (2013) is the latest novel by Meg Wolitzer. The Atlantic’s Jen Doll called it “the book of the moment, the novel you really should read.”

 

 

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The Unknowns (2013) is Gabriel Roth’s first novel. Janet Maslin of the New York Times called it “a sparkling debut.”

 

 

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The Incredibles was a 2004 animated blockbuster from Pixar. Fans (and participants) have never stopped hoping for a sequel.

Image via Razors and Diapers.

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The Intouchables, a 2011 French comedy-drama, was released in North America in 2012. It grossed $218 million worldwide, making it the most successful non-English-language movie in history. The Weinstein Company has obtained the rights to an English-language remake.

Poster from the U.S. release.

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The Expendables (2010) and The Expendables 2 (2012) both starred Sylvester Stallone.

Image via Poetry & Popular Culture.

 

Image via Silva Screen.

Yes, there will be a The Expendables 3.

Simple Minded

Naming your product is so simple! Just ask any of the owners of the 2,177 “simple” marks listed in the U.S. Patent and Trademark database.

Here’s a simple sampling:

 

SimpleHuman “tools for efficient living.” Image source.

 

 

Real Simple magazine: “Life Made Easier”

 

Moist & Simple kosher cake mix, spotted at Cambridge Farms in Los Angeles. Not recommended for people with an aversion to “moist.”

 

Book titles – which can’t be trademarked – also promise simplicity.

 

Simple Times: Crafts for Poor People, by Amy Sedaris (2010).

 

Simple: Conquering the Crisis of Complexity, by Alan Siegel and Irene Etzkorn (2013).

 

When simply simple isn’t simple enough, there’s simpler.

Simpler: The Future of Government, by Cass R. Sunstein (2013). The jacket design exemplifies another current trend, the strikeout.

 

And back in the halls of commerce:

 

Simple Squares organic snack bars.

 

Hershey’s Simple Pleasures, “a delicious treat with 30% less fat vs. the average of the leading milk chocolates.”

 

 

Not So Simple Syrup. Simple syrup is a generic term for a 1:1 ratio of white sugar dissolved in water; Not So Simple Syrup contains flavorings such as blackberry or lemon.

 

Simple Green all-purpose cleaning concentrate.

 

Simple skin care, “sensitive skin experts.”

 

Simple Salmon, a clever twist on Simple Simon.

 

 

 

Nook Simple Touch with GlowLight.

 

Finally, an anthem for simple times, brought to you by The Simpletones.