As I’ve acknowledged, I have a soft spot for “Mr.” names. Mr. Peanut? Mr. Espresso? Mr. Sandwich? Mr. Nature? Mr. Zipper? Mr. Bling Bling? Love ’em all.
But I’m pretty sure I draw the line at “Mr. Bra.”
“I’ve fitted 10-, 12-, 13-year-old girls,” says Mr. Bra. And a little later on: “I’ve sold bartenders this bra!” If you make it to 13:26 you’ll see a sign announcing “Breast Forms Silocone [sic] or Foam,” followed by Mr. Bra dancing with a large synthetic breast and chanting “Call me Mr. Bra, call me Mr. Bra, call me Mr. Breast Form.”
You have been warned.
I haven’t found Mr. Bra’s real name anywhere on his website (another warning: barfogenic zone), which is otherwise very comprehensive (mastectomy bras, transgender bras, lymphedema bra, zipper girdles, padded underpants, history of corsets, “guide to breast care and health for PLUS SIZE women,” etc., etc.). But if you’re in Phoenix you can check out his shop—it’s at 3247 East Thomas—and ask him yourself. He’s also on Twitter.
Via The Hairpin.
Related: “I Know! Let’s Put the Word ‘Flat’ in the Name of Our New Bra!” (via Dustbury)
I actually thought "Flatter Me" was quite a witty name for (presumably) a minimizer bra ... there does seem to be a huge market (so to speak) for such articles.
Posted by: Jan Freeman | April 27, 2011 at 07:23 AM
@Jan: But it isn't a minimizer bra--it promises to "boost cleavage." Which leads me to think the company thought only of "flatter" (verb) without considering "flatter" (adjective).
Posted by: Nancy Friedman | April 27, 2011 at 07:26 AM
Line drawn. With LASERS.
Egads.
Posted by: tanita | April 27, 2011 at 08:31 AM
Egads, indeed! I'm just creeped out by this guy!
Posted by: Joanne Mason | April 27, 2011 at 02:39 PM
This is so wrong. Who the HELL is this guy? I don't care how badly my bra fits from now until eternity, but he will not be assisting me in my fitting needs.
Posted by: Diane Fischler | April 27, 2011 at 03:05 PM
Nancy, that's hilarious; I guess I automatically think it would "flatter me" to be flatter in a number of places, and it never occurred to me they could have overlooked the pun. Duh!
Posted by: Jan Freeman | April 27, 2011 at 06:56 PM
@Jan @Nancy: That's quite the play on words. It was only until I read Nancy's comment that I saw the double meaning.
Funny how context can narrow one's perspective.
Posted by: Melissa | April 27, 2011 at 11:50 PM