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February 10, 2010


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Hmm . . . I LOVE Reloxin around the house on a nice spring day. My guesses as to why that much more pleasant-sounding mark was refused are two: One, it sounds like "relaxing" and two, it sounds like "locks in." I'll bet those are two qualities the FDA wouldn't want the term to convey. But "Die, Sport," as I also immediately dubbed it, is crappy for every reason you've enumerated.

Jessica: So "relaxing" is verboten but "rest" or "restore" or "restyle," as in Restylane, are OK? The ways of government regulators are such a mystery.

Nancy, I don't know. This time I'm just making it up. Maybe they just didn't want consumers thinking it had lox in it.

Our publication covers (among other things) human resources technology, an area that keeps yielding software products with pharmacological-sounding names. Yesterday, I got press releases announcing the arrival of Reflexis (for workforce scheduling) and Clarizen (a project management tool for "transparency in workflow management.") They may be great, but it would be nice if product names gave a clue as to their actual use. I suppose ShowUpOnTime or DoYourJob would be too pedestrian.

Carroll: Clarizen, the eyedrops preferred by Buddhist monks. And Reflexis, the drug I take whenever I have a hostile kneejerk reaction to lame brand names.

Catherine de Medici is thought by some to have been an avid poisoner, so a Botox-based drug from a company called Medicis makes a sort of ironic sense. Of course, a manufacturer called Borgia would make even more sense.

The 12-year-old in me snickers every time "Aciphex" is advertised on television because of the way the name sounds spoken aloud. I guess it's a GERD remedy, but the name makes it sound like it should treat hemorrhoids.

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