Thirsty? NPR's Morning Edition reports that Jones Soda has introduced Orange "You Glad for Change" Soda and that some D.C. bars are pouring Ale to the Chief. Brewery Ommegang of Cooperstown, New York, wanted to name its celebratory quaff Obamagang—a neat multiple pun—but the feds nixed it; the label now reads "Inaugural Ale." You can see the original label art here. (Hat tip: ETBWrites.) Prefer wine? Allow me to pour you a glass of 2005 Yes We Cab!—"elegant and stately, just like Obama himself." Love that illustration. (Hat tip: Karen at Verbatim.)
In the mood for something more caloric? Good news: Ben & Jerry's has created a Yes Pecan! flavor: "amber waves of buttery ice cream with roasted nonpartisan pecans." Proceeds will be donated to the Common Cause Education Fund. (And in the true spirit of nonpartisanship, here are some suggested flavors to honor the Bush, uh, legacy. Hat tip: Karen again.)
Perhaps you'd prefer a more lasting memento. Uncommon Goods is selling an official ballot necklace in sterling silver for just $38:
The ballots featured are either standby-by ballots (used in case the voting machines break down) or absentee, military and special ballots. The double-sided necklace showcases two parties that supported Barack Obama: the Democrat [sic] party and the Working Families Party.
You'd better not be in a hurry, though: this handmade keepsake is back-ordered till Feb. 10. (The McCain-Palin necklace is available a little sooner.)
Uncommon Goods is also selling a framed paper ballot "printed specifically for the old-fashioned, pull-lever voting machines used in New York City": $350. On the opposite end of the spectrum: a Zortz note-holder featuring a slightly scary representation of Obama's head. It's a bargain at $25.
What's that smell? Why, it's Yes We Can fragrance, "directly inspired by Obama's acceptance speech." It contains "notes of celery seed, lavender, citrus accord, and pine," and no, I don't know what "citrus accord" is. The perfume is available for $34 on Etsy.
Another Yes We Can fragrance is for sale on eBay, with no description whatsover, for only $0.99. Tip: Change the name to Eau-bama (change is good!), add some flowery copy, and jack up the price to $25. It'll fly off the shelves.
You can even sleep with your new commander-in-chief. Obama jammies and nightgowns come in adult sizes small through XXL and are 100% cotton flannel. Don't forget the Obama condoms ("for the elitist penis").
And there's much, much more. For a comprehensive list, see Sarah Hepola's compilation over at Salon. She leads with the Obama dildo (talk about a stimulus package!) and proceeds:
There is the Obama votive candle, the Obama nesting dolls, the Obama wall hanging. And lest you feel hampered by details, rest assured that an Obama product doesn't even have to actually resemble Obama: It could resemble a rather frightening Bill Cosby. Or a very tan Ed Sullivan. Or, umm, whatever this guy is.
What a great country, huh?